Having met my current boyfriend on Twitter 4 months ago, I can only say that being yourself and being honest is the best advice I can give to both men and women. I honestly wasnt looking on Twitter for any type of relationship, Im just a natural flirt. So when we began talking football, we clicked and things just naturally progressed.

This is not the first relationship that has come from online for me, but it is the first from a non-dating site. Ive had nothing but good experiences and am still friends with most of the guys Ive dated. I’ve been lucky though…I get hit on a lot online by guys just looking for free pics or hook ups…

I personally feel that there is nothing wrong with online dating. i see it as an oppurnitity to meet more people than you would normally meet. When you go to out and someone of the opposite sex approaches you, you don’t know whether or not that person is crazy, married or a stalker. The only thing is that you can see the person face to face. It all comes down to good old-fashion ‘talking ‘to get to know that person. also, if you don’t have a good judge or character you are screwed for sure. AND guys…please stop it withall the lying. If you plan to meet a lady, what is the point in lying from the beginning? obviously she fell for the person that you portrayed and not the person that you are…..so now we have- TIME WASTED!

I think its possible to meet someone online. I did and we got married.

My wife and I met in a chat room on AOL. It wasn’t love at first site nor was it a quick hook up. It took us 8 years for us to go on our first date. We developed a true friendship, then in 2000 we started dating and Married in 2003.

(7 years so far no itch!)

We weren’t looking for love when we found it. We were looking for friends, which is what we found on AOL that grew into a relationship that ended in Marriage.

I agree with what’s been said thus far.

My last two exes are guys I have met online – not on dating sites but online nonetheless.
In 2000 I was bored while in class and browsed the net for some eye candy (what can I say), ended up checking out some LL Cool J pics and came across the DefJam Chat. The end of the story was a 6 year relationship.
My ex-fiancé and I were both members of the same group/forum.

So while in both instances I was not actively looking for a date/hook up/ love, I came across 2 wonderful guys I would have never met had I closed myself to the idea.

I have met more psychos and nutcases in real life scenarios than I have online. And via the PC I can feel a person out without having to give out my phone number and dealing with annoying phone calls or texts.

Tha online thing is cool. Especially 4me. My dark bown skin, gold grill and tattoos(none on face, neck or below elbow) run alot of chics off at 1st site cause they look and see a “BAD GUY.” So when i chat i always get this line: “ur handsome ,but i would have went the other way had we met in person 1st. i would’ve thought you was a thug.” I’m hood,but no where near thuggish.lol. So online is the biz 4 people who like to judge a book by its cover. Some of u ladies feel me. How many times has a man said ur STUCKUP(normally cause ur pretty) without saying a word 2u.

On line dating opportunities are good for starters, but I think you definitely have to be able to move to an in-person activity if things seem to be on course. I’m not sure what age his target audience is, but I found his suggestions for men and women mostly WHACK bcuz they were soooo basic. You shouldn’t be on line looking for love if all of your pic’s have you looking like a hooker or a male stripper. I did find it “true” that some women go over board depicting themselves as single moms. It’s cool to say you have kids, but I prefer to error on the side of caution when it comes to showing pic’s of kids on line. I have seen profiles of women whose screen name is: X’s mom….or who have 20 pic’s of her kids and one pic of her self. If you’re trying to meet a man……over emphasizing your family right out of the gate is NOT the way to go, IMO.

Meeting a prospective love connect online is just like meeting at a party, in the grocery store or on the street. You are introduced and the personable skiills take over from there.

I love reading online dating ads they are an interesting insight on how folks see themselves, others and dating. They tend to be more revealing than not especially when people go on rants about what they are not looking for in that other person. Online ads are marketing and publicity and some folks are very bad at marketing themselves.

That does not mean its ok to lie about your size, age, height or status which happens too often in my opinion. If you are succesful in attracting someone it will come out eventually!!

Its never where you meet in my view it is what you do with that opportunity.

I hate do’s and dont’s about stuff. You wanna persent yourself not somebody else. If I have a glaring flaw I rather you know up front. I hate games nobody can teach you how to do you.

If somebody dont wanna fuck with Tron as is then so be it Tron dont wanna fuck with you.

Plus Im really turned-off by the double standards. Guys just wanna stick there dick in anything while females are looking to get married.

@DC Man

Im sure he was keeping it simple on purpose. Why give away something free you can charge for.

I’ve met friends online, but dating was a problem. It might be because my profile was geeky as hell and I refused to put up a photo … HA!

I had a very interesting experience on one site, though. I wanted to narrow the field a bit so I only screened for Black and Hispanic men. Didn’t get any of those, but I did get a stream of white guys who wanted to know why I wasn’t checking for them! As I said, I made a few friends that way — after I explained myself, of course!

When it comes to online or any other kind of dating, there should be only one rule: Be honest!

NO HALF NAKED PHOTOS!!!

The rest are pretty obvious, but the above clearly coz u find dudes in there posing in their boxers and flexing msucles and $hit. No that is not attractive! Ninjas just come off lame as hell.

I’m not even get into the wanna be video hoes posing in their underwear or bikini shots. No people!

Wait, no e-stalking?! Umm i’m a true offender myself, so no comment. Lol.

Seriously though what deos e-stalking have to do with online dating? We all do it right? U know, u check up on an ex on facebook/myspace, noone will be the wiser- except the stalker ofcourse.

Unless u on Blackplanet, and u get a notification everytime someone sbeen on your page( thank God for fb and it’s privacy links).

Honesty is always the best policy!!! More people meet online than in person because it’s 2009 and we do everything by computer/internet….everything is virtual. Ive had (and am having) great experience with people I’ve met online. It’s all up to the person to be able to weed through B.S. on chat, over the phone, and TAKE YOUR TIME! If you take your time you are less likely to waste your time on someone you could never see yourself with…unless your just lookin to hook up!!

You always find the best pics for the blog!

Online dating has been a bleesing and a curse for me, however I am now engaged to the only man that convinced me that marriage “is” all it’s cracked up to be. I met him on the noted, cursed Blackplanet..LOL

I live in a college town, so finding someone that isn’t into clubbing and chicken wings was a task, so I took to meeting people I wouldn’t normally meet and I’ve met some complete a**holes but thank goodness I caught that early.

@ Chanel, you said a mouthful, JUST BE HONEST

Don’t really feel the online dating. I haven’t done it but I know people that have. I think in most cases online dating is substituted for real life and probably breaks up more relationships than it puts together. I wonder how many people ended relationships for someone they met online?

I agree w/ Elle! There are crazies walking the streets, and online lets you get some conversation going without giving out the digits.

haha with all the talk of hooking up over social networks i feel the need to mention something i found recently.

I was watching Dr. Drew Sex Rehab and i damn near fell out when one of the commercials was for a new site called, im not kidding, http://www.onlinebootycall.com

the irony…

Onlinebootycall has been out for years now. I remember from when I was just starting college in 05 I would get invites in my email asking me to join.

Very interesting….but hey….at least its straight to the point.

I…I…I just can’t do it at all. My previous relationship was started of an online site but we still knew each other from mutual friends but that ended horribly, two years worth of stalking…I’ll pass. But Like you Anslem I feel like a lame even attempting or thinking about online dating its just not my cup of tea. I mean I’m 25 years old and looking for someone who can at least have a convo with me face to face. What am I gonna do with you if u can only talk to me on aim??

@b.better

Who says that the person you meet online can ONLY talk to you on aim?

Everyone in this day and age owns a computer. The guy you work with, the one who uses the same laundromat, the one you see at the grocery store every week. It’s not just geeky über-nerds and ex-cons.

The way we all converse here on Ans’ blog we could do the same thing at a bar over some drinks. We’re still the same people.

If it’s not your cup of tea, I am certainly not trying to change your mind. But I am trying to understand the awkwardness it is incorporating for you.

@Elle

I never said anyone was a nerd or an ex-con and I know everyone and their mama has a computer and is on some social website. What I’m saying is from my experiences I’ve met men who literally could not hold a conversation without being behind a computer. And I thought it was rather strange. (this is based totally of what I’ve experienced) I mean I did date someone from online, but it just seems to me that these sites just seriously breakdown that physical social relationship we are suppose to have. Its like some dudes would rather hit me on facebook and send me a note than come up and hold a decent conversation with me…and I find that rather odd.

I’d prefer for someone to come and actually talk to me then email me, facebook me, myspace me, or anything else not dealing with face to face contact.

@b.better

Im sure all those people were lame with or without the net. I dont think it has anything to do with the world wide web killing people social skills as much as some people just dont have social skills to began with. And it just makes it easy for lame people to gather a lil mac! Just like liquor gives some people courage so does the internet.

So let me think this through, you meet someone online they can’t hold a conversation over the phone or face to face and they are socially awkward. Traits you don’t necessarily find appealing but you decide to continue dating them, because???

Throne I think you may confusing who is the lame in the scenario. Just saying Yo!!!

I have met women online and offline and honestly there is not much difference in the quality of the people. Online gives you the benefit and encountering people you would never necessarily encounter in your day to day and on the other hand you run into people you would never choose to encounter in your day to day.

What has not changed is your responisibility to discern who or what you find appealing in others you want to date. I have heard of people who have a hard timee saying no and often get pushed by others into dating or other types of relationships. If that is you stay indoors.

@ Rastaman

LOL you are toooo funny, going for my neck I see. So I’m the lame? lol. Personally I find a stimulating convo a serious turn on and if I can’t talk to u and see were your head is at face to face or even over the phone than I instantly get turned off and its not even going to work. So I have no idea were u got that I’d even date someone like that. I just find that a lot of dudes like the Throne said get that PC/MAC courage and can talk the talk behind a screen but don’t know how to function when u finally meet them. So shoot me if I like to have a frst time meeting face face to feel you out then over the net. Thats just how I feel I guess we can just say we have a difference of opinion and leave it at that.

Some people just dont have decent communication skills, not compatible and just may not b interested n u as u think. You can be honest with people and they still will do sum wack shyt. No diff in online, u meet a person, feel them out and make ur move. U like or u dont, works the same way face 2 face,rite? @b. better..pretty sure u’ve had bad face 2 face encounters as well. We all do.

When it comes to meeting and dating women, I got turned onto foreign women when I started traveling. There should be a saying once you go with foreign women, you never go back.

When I think about this whole online dating experience, I think about one of my good friends. She’s one of those people who has had her share of online dating, chatting, phone conversing relationships. I’ve mostly been able to view this concept through her experiences. They have not been good. Besides the fact that she clearly has some issues (which I am starting to see more and more), the people she has met have all been “off”. Off meaning socially awkward, wack, boring and just all around uninteresting. Just knowing my friend and knowing that her insecurities are leading her seek these sites and what they can offer her reinforces my idea that people who engage in these behaviors are insecure and/or “off”. Now, I DID NOT say this was/is a fair assessment of the situation but I am saying I am still in the process of forming my own opinion on online dating and have taking her experiences into account.

It’s something about online dating that makes me want to say in my best elderly voice “Back in my day we looked each other in the face not a profile pic and emoticon!” haha. (I’m 23 by the way)
I am not comfortable at all with the concept of online dating and I personally prefer face2face interactions. This is not to say that face2face meetings are fool proof but this is to say that at least I can take in more (of that person). I can see how they’re interacting with other people, mannerisms, looks etc. Real Life is sooo much better than Cyber World!

The bottom line is that dating of any form is just as much about luck as anything. I perfer phone conversing and IMing because it allows you to focus on what most important when meeting somebody their personality. Everything else is cosmetic. I can tell weither Im sexually attracted to you or not in a matter of seconds. Trying to figure out your personality takes more effort. I rather not be blind by a chicks beauty or ignore a good fit because shes not stunningly beautiful.

HMM Online dating huh? This is interesting. To be honest, I have met a lot of people online. Not to date, but just to meet people. I moved to a metroplex from a country town and didn’t know anyone. So I turned online, and the group of people I met were so nice they threw me a birthday party a few months later!

I must say that I have dated a few guys that I have met online. I actually feel more comfortable meeting someone online. Hell if I meet a “kind of” cute guy at the store, and he asks for my number, I feel obligated to get his/give my contact information. I don’t like to give my number out to just anybody…whereas if I meet dude online, we can email, im, or Facebook all day long to get to know one another. Yeah I know I could give dude my email address…BUT where I’m from, you can’t say “oh here is my email address” cuz you won’t hear from dude at all!! lol

I agree with most. Today is the age of computers and everyone is online. So the same as if I meet someone at the store I can meet someone online. I don’t see a problem with it. Not all are gonna be mates or even associates but it can be as harmless or as serious as you please. Your choice in the end.

Except few basic things, internet is going to be the most popular trend in the coming future. Then why not online dating. Many friends of mine who used to loathe online dating and judged others on finding love online are on the internet today searching high and low for their better half. I think if used honestly and truthfully, finding your love online can be a lot of fun and rewarding.

meeting and dating online is the 2009 version of the bar scene and club. Everybody is online. why wouldnt u take advantage of that and find someone u match with.
Ive met people from AOL, blackplanet, myspace. None of those turned out well but I see the possibility for something positive.

http://www.CandidBACKshots.com

I’VE MEET MY LOVE ONLINE TOTALKED WEEKS BEFORE WE MEET WE DIDN’T LIE TO EACH OTHER WE STATED ARE DISLIKES AND LIKES FROM THE BEGINNING AND WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMOM I DON’T THINK WE WOULD’VE MEET IF IT WASNT FOR BEING ONLINE I KNOW IT WORKS IF YOUR OPEN AND HONEST RIGHT FROM THE START

At first I was hesitant to meet people online but I’ve found that people are more prone to be themselves online as opposed to you meeting their “representative” face to face. Plus you have an opportunity to meet people from different cities, states, countries that you wouldn’t ordinarily come into contact with everyday.

my two skeets.

avatars-the digitized you or you in the digital sense even if its just a digital picture.

never really tried it seriously. I tried it tho. Not my thing lest a true groove was caught-like meeting people in the flesh. it’s email luv in the digital era. i need to take down that beach photo from my dating site profile…i really, really do.

honestly, I really must not be online enough socially. I meet a few folks here and there but rarely date. hmmn.

guess i’m jess a lil to flesh and bone wit it cause at the end of the day ya wants ta flesh and bone.

wait.

im more of a 6 degrees of separation or zero degrees of connection. actually, any time i see you see me see you it’s on if i like what i see and the vibe i feel and vice versa.

ya know?

even digitally…

I met my partner online almost 3 years ago. I think if you’re careful and sensible it can work, but I would ALWAYS meet the person before you get too carried away. It’s easy for people to hide behind a false personality.

http://lovexxtra.blogspot.com

I think the internet should be used to communicate with friends you know and to expand your knowledge.

Do people realize how much of your information can be got through the internet? I think it’s more of risk online than in person. There are a lot of people that keep their skeletons in the closet and now they can take their laptop in the closet too and have the courage they wouldn’t normally have. I’m not saying its lame but I have more appreciation for someone if I can see them. I also pick up a lot more in peoples body language than their text.

People are lacking social skills because we are getting anti-social. We are afraid to meet people because of what might happen or they look gangsta or whatever. Do you think about how many murderers and killers am I sitting by in church, at your favorite eat spot, at the movies, or at the ball game? NOOO!!! We are so worried about our safety when we are trying to date that it forces some to do it online.

I can tell you I’m a 6′3″ 215 black and puerto rican and can converse with the best of them but in reality I’m the 5″10 nightmare of your life because the internet is the perfect disguise.

I’m not trying to spread fear but the internet surfaced another avenue for crime. They are catching a lot of people but the criminals are people that we would have never suspected. People that appeared to the public one way but online they were someone else!!

Be Careful People!!

Online or in person. You never know what type of person you are getting involved with. A person can seem totally cool and one day just SNAP! and kill everybody in house because there was no cheese on his grits. A nut is not going to tell you they’re a nut.

yes, you can find love online. my first love and first sexual partner was a dude i met online. i was 23 (and a virgin by choice) so meeting someone online was ideal in a lot of ways.

we spoke everyday, for several hours each day, for about a year and half before we met. i got to know him in that time frame far better than i would’ve locally. imho, sex ruins things and often puts a halt to the getting to know you phase so for some, online dating, when you find the right person, can be life-changing.

once we met, our relationship lasted two years and despite an ugly break-up, 7 years later, we are still best friends. i can call him whenever i need to and i know he will always be there for me…and vice versa.

that relationship/friendship was so impactful that about a year ago i tried dating online again and a year later i’ve found yet another boi who’s captured my mind. time will tell if he captures my heart.

on a side note, the tips you suggested are rather pitiful and one is frankly stupid. why the heck would i want to see a guy online in pictures with other women? if you’re looking for something serious, those types of pics scream “booty call.” a tasteful shirtless pic is far better than pics of a guy with his numerous ex-gfs.

guys also should take time with their profiles, spell check and contrary to the above tips, don’t keep it short and sweet. you don’t have to write a book but “i want woman whos cute, funny and likes to do thing. msg me if intrested” shows that you’re lazy, stupid and probably up for playing games.