Are You Scared of the First Kiss? (When to Make Your Move)
When it comes to women and courtship, I tend to move pretty slow. I blame it on the fact that I’m horrible at reading signals and, for better or worse, I try my best to be a gentleman. Sure, I may have a slick tongue and can find the perverse undertone in almost anything, I’m usually just talking shit. (Unless you gon’ do it).
At the end of the day, I’m a pretty shy guy.
Honest.
Back in the Taco Meat era, liquor was my great equalizer. My liquid courage if you will. Give me a couple rounds of Ketel & cran (or worse yet, any dark liquor) and I’d be a completely different and more aggressive person known as Taco Meat. He’s always good for a good time, but he often got me in way more trouble than it was worth.
But that was then and this is now.
Today, I’m a completely different person.
Being that I rarely drink these days, and when I do it’s in moderation, my aggressive side remains mostly dormant. In its place is everyday, cool, calm, collected and contemplative NWSO. While that makes for a better overall person, it sometimes sucks for my dating life.
A couple summers ago I was seeing this young lady named Regine. We’d go out a couple times a week, watch movies at each other’s house, have great conversations and an overall good time. I liked her a lot and believed the feeling was mutual, but I never saw an opportunity to make a move so I always chickened out never went in for a kiss—or anything else for that matter.
By time the fall came around, the romantic dynamic eventually phased out of the equation and Regine and I just fell into the friend zone. One day over dinner we found ourselves reminiscing on how we had evolved from potential daters to becoming such good friends.
I said something to the effect of, “Yeah, I guess it was a squandered opportunity.”
“What do you mean by that,” Regine asked.
“Well, I was really diggin’ you when we first met but things never went anywhere.”
“And whose fault is that?”
“No ones,” I replied. “I just never got the vibe you wanted to take it any further than just friends so I stayed in my lane.”
“Well, I thought the same thing about you because you never tried to kiss me or anything,” Regine said.
“I actually wanted to kiss you plenty of times but I never saw an opportunity.”
“What? You had plenty of chances,” she huffed. “Do you always move that slow?”
“Not always but I don’t go anywhere I’m not invited.”
“Well, you won’t have to worry about that anymore ’cause your invite was revoked a long time ago.”
Ouch!
Despite my blown opportunity with Regine due to moving too slow, it’s better than going for a kiss too soon. There’s nothing worse than leaning in for that first kiss and getting nothing but side cheek.
Talk about a blow to the male ego.
That’s happened to me once or twice in my lifetime and it never made me eager to go in for another kiss (or anything else) anytime soon thereafter. Call me slow all you want but without a clear and obvious signal from a woman that I have the green light I’d much rather wait for the right time to make a move.
Ladies, would you think a guy wasn’t interested if he took too long to kiss you? Would you prefer a guy take too long or go in too soon? How important is a first kiss to how far the relationship will go? Are women just as anxious about a first kiss as men? What kind of signals do you give a guy that you want to kiss him? Would you ever make the first move on a guy that was moving too slow? Fellas, have you ever gone in for a first kiss and got side cheek? Did the “rejection” make you less likely to try again anytime soon? How good are you at reading a woman’s signals? What would you do if a woman made a move on you first? Does liquor help cut down on sexual tension?
Speak your piece…
LMAO
I ALWAYS finish what I start. I’m no quitter!
“Are You Scared of the First Kiss? (When to Make Your Move)”