Would She Make a Good Mother? (What Men Think)
Men are visual creatures. We like T&A in abundance and we’re prone to doing completely idiotic things in the pursuit of what women have down below. All of these factors make men pretty vain. For the most part, a lot of us spend most of our lives focused on the physical and don’t give much thought to the mental.
To put things into a better perspective, I’ll recall something one of my boys told me in college. “As long as a woman has two out of the Three B’s I could work with her,” he said.
“What are the ‘Three B’s,’” I asked.
“Breasts, booty and beauty,” he said. “If a girl is lacking more than one of those three physical traits, then I have no use for her.”
Ouch!
While the above exchange represents some of the worst male dialogue about women, it’s also a realistic look into how some men think. Despite the cold-blooded nature of my college buddy’s mate selection process, I have high hopes that one day he, along with many other men, eventually grow out of that kind of thinking and asks himself one very critical question: Would she make a good mother?
After all the skirt-chasing and oat-sowing stages of youth (early-late adulthood for some), there hopefully comes a point in a man’s life where he desires more from a woman than a nice body. That’s not to say that we completely lose our visual creature-ness, but there’s a time where we see the Three B’s for what they are—BS.
When a man (and even some women who think like men) comes to that realization, things like the future start to outweigh physical features. As much as men want that hot wife who doesn’t have big girl tendencies and can lay it down in the bedroom like nobody’s business, we pretty much want to settle down with a wife not just a wifey.
If a woman is going to have any real shot at being a man’s “the one,” he has to believe she will be a good mother, IMHO. Think about it. What man wants his child(ren) raised by someone without an ounce of maternal instinct or lacks domestic skills? I know how sexist that may sound to some, but I’d like to believe women do the exact same thing.
Along with a man playing the role of provider and caretaker in a woman’s life, most also want someone with the qualities of a good father to walk down the aisle with them. It just takes men a little bit longer to realize the value of those kinds of qualities in the women they date and pursue. A hot girl that likes to have fun is cool for right now, but when it comes down to the happily ever after, a man (and woman) is going to require stability. As the old saying goes, you can’t turn a “ho” into a housewife.
Despite the importance of a woman having motherly instincts, there can also be a dramatic downside. I forgot who said it, but I believe he said something to the effect of: “Every man wants to marry a woman who can be a hot mom, but no man wants to marry his mom.” Basically, there are some women who exude more motherliness than sexiness and that’s NotAGoodLook.com status. Don’t take this the wrong way, ladies, but coming off as “old” and “stuffy” is in no way appealing to a man.
A couple years ago I went out with this woman that just had this motherly vibe about her. We had great conversation and I could see her being a great mom (packing lunch, telling bedtime stories, etc.), but she was lacking in the sex appeal department. If she carried herself like a mom now, what was she going to be like when she actually had kids? Sorry, I wasn’t going to wait around to find out.
Let’s be clear, I’m not saying that all women lose their sex appeal once they have kids, but both guys and gals have been known to let themselves go after parenthood kicks in. I totally understand that when the little ones are your focus there’s less time for getting dolled up, but the last thing a man on a date wants is to be sitting across from someone that reminds him of his own mother and not the future mother of his kids. That’s the difference between MILFs and WILFs (Women I’d Like to Forget).
How important are parent qualities in the people you choose to date? Have you ever dated someone you knew would not make a good parent? If so, why did you even date them? Do you have less tolerance for mates with no parenting skills as you get older? What traits do you use to determine if someone will be a good mother or father? Single ladies, do you think you’d make a good mother and wife? Why? Fellas, could you marry a woman who had no domestic skills? Would you rather have a trophy wife or a woman that could hold down the household? Is it a turn off to date a woman that is too motherly? How many people have you slept with that you honestly could say would be a good parent?
Speak your piece…
“Would She Make a Good Mother? (What Men Think)”