Can a Bad Trip Ruin a Relationship?
They say you never really know someone until you live with them. However, based on the reaction to my post about people shacking up a few weeks ago, it seems like a lot of folks are opposed to the idea of living in sin. The general train of thought appears to be that many women feel, “Why would a man buy the cow if he can get the milk for free?” The (male) jury is still out on that one, but what about playing house for just a few days? No, I don’t mean those weekend-long sexathons smitten couples have, I’m talking about a vacation.
Going out of town with someone for an extended period of time is a big step in any relationship—romantic or platonic. No matter how close y’all are, more times than not you’re going to need a little space after being cooped up together for days on end. I remember when me and my boys spent eight days in Trinidad and Tobago for carnival. We had a blast, but also got involved in several fights with each other and were so sick of seeing each other that we went about a week before any of us hung out after we got back Stateside. It was never any beef it’s just spending eight days straight with the same people/person can drive anyone crazy. For the most part friends tend to get over any vexing moments on vacation pretty easily, but couples are a whole other story.
A few years back there was this girl Jessica that I was really feeling. We spoke every single day for like five or six months and then went on vacation together. The five days away in a different locale and climate were great, but there were a few instances of us having a difference of opinion and previously unseen personality quirks on both sides that made for a few rough patches. Once we got back home, our six-month streak of daily communication finally broke and we slowly grew apart. There was never an official conversation or specific issue that I can think of, but the relationship pretty much went downhill after that trip.
After talking with a few people about this, I realized that I wasn’t the only one to experience the honeymoon being over shortly after a trip. My theory about this phenomenon is that if your mate has any annoying habits or character flaws that you didn’t know about, they’ll definitely come to light on a long trip. People can deny it all they want but during the initial stages of dating someone, we all tend to let our “representative” do all the talking. That’s the side of ourselves we want people to see. You’ll be on your best behavior and try to make some sort of good impression. Anyone can keep up appearances for a few hours, but if you spend consecutive days together your at-home-self will eventually come out.
Say Shelly and Robert go to Tahiti for a week. Sooner or later she’s going to realize that Rob doesn’t keep his hotel room as tidy as his apartment when he knows she’s coming over. Conversely, Robert will see that Shelly’s legs aren’t always that smooth and she uses a half a can of Nair to remove all those budding follicles. Of course these are just surface level revelations that can be overlooked (well, as long as you’re not shallow), but chances are you’ll discover something about your travel buddy that you didn’t know about that will start to annoy you by trip’s end. Depending on the strength of the couple’s relationship, that one thing(s) can snowball into disgust and spell doom for your once harmonious union. Not all is lost, though, the one bright side to breaking up after a trip is that your bags are already packed. Lol. 
Have you seen couples break up or become distant after a trip together? Was it because they discovered some things about their mate that they didn’t know? Have you ever gone on a trip and been turned off by your traveling buddy’s habits? Do you find yourself needing a few days away from someone after you’ve traveled together? Do you agree that you don’t really see someone’s true colors until you travel or live together? How important do you think personalities are when traveling? What was your worst vacation experience?
Speak your piece…
“Can a Bad Trip Ruin a Relationship?”