I like big lips, I heard the same DSL nonsense in high school about mine, even though they’re not all that big. Meagan was cute in Eve’s Bayou I think having a big nose would cause the most insecurities. A lot of folks end up getting work done especially us black folks, but I think it’s harder to fix a wide nose as opposed to just smoothing a bump. I say be proud of what u have, whatever someone else has to say…shake it off!

I have big lips, and yeah there were often comments made, but I think that the way that you were able to deal with these kind of things depending on who they came from and why they started. Although baby gurl in school might have gotten flack initially if the statements were unfounded by her actions they would have died off… But if you do those type of things then you have to be ready to accept the consequences that come with it. Hmm this post has kind of taken a different turn.. Im sure that you might not have time to read all of your replys but if you do happen to read this post maybe thats another blog topic possibility… Females who do those type of acts on a regular but then have a problem with the label. I don’t know maybe its an ownability issue.. clearly ownability is not a word… I know…

@ BlackDreams

I read every single comment

Always surprises me that people think I dont.

oh, well, i’ll put your idea in the thought pile

well, you must have a lot of time! it just seems like there are so many comments! I love your blog! I am so excited to catch up with all of the rest of the ones that I missed!

@ BlackDreams

Not really. Just part of the job. I wrote to hear people’s thoughts and y’all take the time to share it’s only right that I read your comments. Can’t respond to all but i get the message nonetheless…

Spread the word.. LOL

When I was little, I was teased for having slanted eyes. Kids would ask me “Which of your parents is Asian?” And “How do you see out those slits?”

Well as an adult, my eyes get me a lot of attention from folks because of their shape. So nah nah nah to the bullies. lol

OHHHHHHmg lolol this is such a good topic.

So I’m a pretty petite girl now, a lot of people think I’m just a “mature” 16 year old (hence my nickname, Lolita), but the way I look now is the same way I looked when I was 11 years old…I was one of those girls that developed early lol Especially my boobs. I love them now but they were such an inconvenience for me as a 4th grader. I remember one day my bra was so uncomfortable for me that I took it off under my shirt in class and put it inside my desk. Somehow (I still have no idea how LOL) it fell out of my desk and onto the floor and I didnt realize until the rude boy in the class picked it up and screamed, “Who’s baskets is this?”

I snatched that ish out of his hand so fast LMBOOO it wasn’t that serious to me until my male teacher made me stay after class to explain to me that I shouldn’t take off my bra in class and that I had to be careful because I matured early…you can imagine how awkward this conversation was lolol It was a reality check for me that basically told me I had to take the on responsibility of handling an older body at a young age which was so hard.

I been dancing since I was 8 and I remember being so self-conscious about my boobs showing through my leotard, especially since everyone else was so…flat lolol My mom obviously wasn’t buying me no Vicky’s so my nips were ALWAYS showing through lolol In the 5th grade, boys would dare each other to touch my boobs. They would distract me by talking to me and then be touching my boobs. I only noticed it once, I have no idea how long they had been doing it LOL I was hurt because it was like my boobs came before I did. By 6th grade I just got used to it and it was no longer a surprise that 16 year old boys wanted to holla. By 7th grade one of my friends had nicknamed me “Boobs.” By high school, in addition to hormones and music videos, I was so used to people being caught up in my physical that I became a little sexpot lolol I wasn’t loose by any means, but I was under the false impression that my good personality and intelligence was a bonus to my sexiness. Fortunately, I learned the truth before I went off the deep end lol

I’m so writing an essay right now lol but I forgot about how I really had to grow into my boobs.

I wasn’t teased too much as a kid. I was mostly picked on by boys though. they did the usual: run by and hit me on my butt, pull my ponytail and expect me not to retaliate. Little did they know, I grew up with an older brother and plenty of male cousins who I had to constantly defend myself against…the last thing I was going to do was let some boy in elementary school attack me with no repercussion lol

Speaking of my crazy cousins, my closest one took it upon himself to convince me that I was really chinese and my parents found me in a dumpster when I was a baby. This was his explanation to why my eyes were slanted. And it caused me to give mom and dad the side eye well into my teenage years.

One thing I’ve noticed though: those who were usually the bully, turned out to be nobody as an adult. Thats why it makes me sad that kids get so down by what happens to them in jr high/high school. Those 4 years fly by and sooner than you know it, you’ll be at your 10 yr reunion looking at the ones who clowned you everyday and you see that they suck as human beings. lol

Hmm, I guess that’s one of those examples of “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

I made myself feel insecure more than I was ever being bullied. I had the same height and weight at age 11 that I have now at age 31. Go figure. I was taller than all of my classmates at the time, I was heavier, had boobies … eh. Muy annoying!

As far as me bullying others, I have to admit that I am not sure what falls into the “bullying category”. There was this one girl I couldn’t stand. Nobody could stand her for multiple reasons. And while I didn’t actively bully her in the sense that I initiated anything, I refused to talk to her and flat out ignored her. She didn’t exist in my version of the universe. If this is considered bullying, then I guess I was a bully. Do I regret it? No. She is probably just as “ignorable” as an adult as she was back then.

Basically, I was lucky. My school or really my class was pretty civil and we all got along rather well. There were no fights, no groups, no division into popular vs. unpopular.

When I was growing up, my siblings and peers would tease me about my huge….”Big Eyes!” My nick name growing up was Bug (Short for Bug Eyes.) Of course this made me overly insecure about my huge eyes, but I always shrugged it off like the comments never bothered me.

Now that I am in college my friends envy and compliment my huge lids, while guys call them sexy.

In grade school and my early years of junior high, I heard the phrase “bubba lips” given to kids who were well endowed in the lip area. And when I looked in the mirror and saw my full lips, I just knew that someday they would get around to teasing me. So I tucked my lips in a lot. In fact, I have two class pictures with me smiling with my lips tucked in. I don’t have to tell you how funny I look. But by the last year of junior high, I discover lip gloss and decided to celebrate the fact that I had full lips. A few years ago while reminiscing with a former classmate, I discovered that while I was flaunting how pretty the cheap Avon stuff looked on my lips, guys in my class were labeling me as a chick with DSL. “Your lips were always so shiny. You always looked like you were ready.” Those were his exact words. I’m so glad I didn’t hear the comments back then, because they would have made me even more insecure and I would have reverted right back to tucking those babies in when I smiled.

Besides, I had enough to think about back then, because all through the last year of junior high I was labeled a slut. My parents were super strict and I wasn’t allowed to have boys call my house, but I gave my number to my play boyfriend anyway. When I wouldn’t let him kiss me in Spanish class, he “broke up with me” and decided to spread false rumors about me and give my number to every boy in the eighth grade. By day those dirty little suckers told me in great detail what they wanted to do to me–one even sent me a note telling me he wanted to rape me–and by night they prank called my house. My parents were pissed by the phone calls; and I felt dirty about what people were thinking about me. I had never even kissed a boy–I finally got around to doing that at 19–let alone anything else. But I developed a nasty reputation based on hearsay. So what did young me do in response, I became a heavy flirt. I was like “eff it, if they want to think a certain way about me, then that’s how I’m gonna act.” I finally woke up when one day a classmate said to me, “Damn, S…, you’re so pretty and smart, but why do you have to be such a slut?” I was floored, because I realized right there that that is exactly how I was acting. So I decided to quit all that crap before things really got out of hand.

@ NWSO
This is a good post, because as a reformed teaser I hid behind my own insecurities to make others feel bad. I never told all my friends that grown men have been commenting on my lips since I was a child and that one even went so far as to expose himself to me on the Metro train.

But as former teaser (I don’t consider the ribbing I did to be bullying), I have ran into some of the people I made fun of and I have made amends. Surprisingly, most of them didn’t seem to remember or they remarked about how they used to talk junk about people as well. All in all I think all people make fun or tease each other as a way to cope, but I think it takes a strong person to apologize and make sure their taunts don’t go too far. I know I have tried and I think this post will make other people try as well.

Oh gosh you took me back and brought back buried memories. I was teased in my neighborhood back in the caribbean and i really can’t say why – well i could but i won’t. Being teased only made me become a bully as I grew older before i migrated to the US. I did it because it took the attention away me and focused it on someone else so I started fights and picked on people and got to hang with the “popular crowd”. I am not proud of who I was back then or the hurt that i caused some but…
When i came to the states my accent got made fun of. Then there was those “champion” sneakers I was rocking thinking it was cool. I remember thinking of the song “Champion” by Buju Banton when i chose it from Models. I remembered my friend boyfriend making fun of it. Then there was the “payless” version of L.A light ups. I got away with it until one day the class clown in Junior H. dropped his pencil and got a good look at them. Oh the shame…. The thing was that my parents did not care in spending so much money on brand name so what was i supposed to do? I guess it kind of helped me now because i am not a materialistic person, i am not one to run out and get the lastest of this or that. I work hard for what I own and I do without what I can’t afford – it really is not a big deal to me now.
I can say though, I know I look good, could get my sexy on and I am confident for the person that I am right now.

oh adolescence/ts….

i was not a teaser but often a defender of the defenseless since i caught hell for having big ears that stuck out. i have/had(?) ears that stuck out like cup hanldes thanks to paternal genetics. it was the first characteristic that my unrequited crushes noticed and used as reason for not liking me back. this topped off by the fact that i was a late bloomer in every sense of the word (i wore horrid glasses, had braces, was flat chested with a big bum) didn’t help my cause. of all the things i was teased for, my ears were the thing i would remain most sensitive about into adulthood. only time and self love heal those things. thank goodness i have both in abundance.

I was teased aboout several things growing up! My infamous nose that I inherited from My father and his side of the family!…funny thing was I got teased mostly by family than by strangers~go figure! I had a complex about that all of 2 seconds b/c I loved my father and looked just like him! Then when I was in school b/c my name is so exotic, kids purposely jack up my name and add crap to it thinking it was funny! Then of course I had a big butt so that was a issue and still is! I just never understood the fascination with wanting to slap a big booty! But I took it all in stride and never let it get to me! B/c i got teased I didnt allow anyone to be teased around me and if I seen a kid getting teased I would say something……..unless it was someone I didnt like or rubbed me the wrong way! LOL

i was teased when i was in elementary through out high school i am one of the ones who grew a complex. Until about five years ago i couldnt even look a man in his eyes because of all the teasing that i endured the sad part is it was done at the hand of my so called best friends so i figured they were right about me i was the really skinny black girl with no shape with short unmanageable hair and they were the over weight big everything spanish girls and even though they hurt me a lot i clung on to them because they were the only friends i had back then.now im older and have filled out quite nicely and i still have a few issues stemming from the teasing and bullying that took place back then

The question in my case should be what wasn’t I teased about back in the day. At the time I honestly do not know how I got through it but I did. The one thing I took away from the experiance is that kids/people will be dealing with their own issues and use other people as a punching bag to make themselves feel better but at the end of the day you cannot value yourself or see yourself through the eyes of others but have to form and hold on firmly to your own sense of self. Sticks and stones….

I used to work with this stunning young lady who is every bit of a dime and knew it. She was a very big tease(which is a huge turn off for me) and seemed very self assured. She had a gorgeous set of soup coolers. And me being the clown I am would refer to them only to find out she was very insecure about them. Which made me think how can a female this beautiful have any insucurity let alone about the sexy feature she had. She had the face with a killer body and a smile that showcased the Lil Kim(before she filled them) over bite. She was like a dream girl she had all the lil things I like in a girl. But despite the beauty and the charm(she was a charming f*cker) I sensed something deeper bother that 1. She completely abused our friendship with some drama that I promised never to get myself into. Damn the things a man will do for a pretty face , a fat ass, and some big ass lips. LOL

But I always use to think what kinda stuff did she deal with growing up that made her so insecure?

I’ll admit I was a teaser ,but to my defense I grow up the youngest of the boys. I was already some what of a brat then you couple that with a family of smartasses and teaser and you get were im going. So by the time I got into elementary I was so use to being teased by my brothers it took alot to get under my skin. I was conditioned to be a teaser(plus I was so damn good at it) so I would tease other kids not knowing how hurtful it was because it didnt bother me much(and I was still kinda bratty)

It wasnt til late Jr. High or High school I realized that my words could cut real deep so I would hold back some as not to sting to much. It was better going to a all boys high school because we werent as sensitive as girls and all we did was clown each other. But I learned how to make fun of people in a way that we can all have fun even if it meant making fun of myself!

I was really short until the summer right before my Senior year in High School and I used to get ribbed like crazy about needing to carry around a step-stool just to kiss a girl. Being dark-skinned also got me teased in those days (”Black as Tar”, “Turn on the High Beams so we can see Jay”). It didnt really bother me because I have always been quick witted and usually had a come-backer that would make them lay-off me. Now im a 5′11′ Chocolate King to the ladies….I wouldnt trade those experiences for the world tho, they def made me tougher and contributed to the whole person I am today.

I used to get teased all the time for my hair not being done and for my clothes. It taught me to not put much stock in what people say, although I did learn to keep my hair done . Unfortunately, I think that sometimes I take the “F___ it” attitude a bit too far, because these days I know I should dress up some more but can’t find the motivation!

i got teased for being dark skinned andit did jack with my psyche and self esteem for a while…especially when i saw dudes were checking heavy for the light skin girls after a while i let it go and realized im too cute and have too much going on for me to feel like im being held back because im dark and the dudes talking how one color is better than the other i see they dont realize black is black

OO gosh this is going to feel like Therapy because I have to vent…

Something like Young Jay, I have dark skin..

I also have very full lips, Big feet (size 10) and hairy arms, big forehead, a lot of hair on my head, etc………

O gosh the boys in school use to call me “Monkey” remind you these were other black children, they called me monkey because of my full lips and hairy arms, and big forehead!

i use to cry home to my mother!! I wanted to cover up my forehead with some bangs and just go to school without getting teased! To make matter worse I liked this boy from class and he liked be too!! Just so happen that week I had bangs and he was showing me fever! (This was about 7th grade!) Boy o Boy I was excited!!

But just like any other girl that was 12 I had no control over my hair and my mother did my hair without bangs so I wen to school with a peep in my step and my so called crush told me that he doesn’t like me anymore because I didn’t have bangs!!!!!! (WTF!) Major blow to my sef esteem! But that taught me a serious lesson about guys!!

But I’m a fine 29 year old sistah now that has a boyfriend that loves all my foreheads, curves, full lips, chocolate hips, hairy arms and such!!!!!!!

@NWSO

I’ll make sure I’ll send you a photo!!

I was teased in grade school because I was darker than most of the kids and i went thru puberty at nine, so at 14 i had tits, ass, hips and thighs. And to top it all off I was 5′7 173lbs and dark skinned. Now I am considered to be bad. Still thick in all the right places i must add. I see guys that I went to school with and the do double takes now. They are like K, dayum you looking good. All i can say is Thank You and think back.

I had a crush on this one guy so so bad. Everyone knew it, even him. But he told every one I was too big and black.

I saw this dude last summer, and to his surprise I still look the same. i have not aged one bit, maybe 30 lbs heavier but I am still doing the dayum thing. I am a professional in my field, I make good money, and i don’t have 20 crumb snatchers biting my ankles. Neddless to day he was in awe…He was qucik to ask me out on a date, telling me he can do this and that for me, and I looked at him as if he was the mean little boy that hurt my feelings and kindly said I will pass.

My confidence shines through. I am proud to be a thick beautiful black queen. But being teased made me develop a thicker skin and become a stonger person. Sticks and stones my break my bones but words will never hurt me. Learning that lesson early in life prepared me for what the world will say about you and to you. Take is with a grain of salt and a lemon wedge..I got the Tequila. It is what it is…

excuse the typos….no spell check…

yup, i got teased nigger nose, nigger lips, and’ that’s just what my own grandfather used to say to me…to make a long story short, many men now ask if i’m from jamaica or africa or if i’m “mixed” with something because of my “exotic” features. Like my momma told me GOD don’t make no junk, and i can now look back at all the teasing i received as training, i’ve been dogged about as much as a person can be, so now I have no choice but to walk like a queen and there are literally no words that can ever take away my sense of beauty. I had to look at myself in the mirror and see myself as beautiful, when everyone around me swore up and down I was ugly, and that my friends is a gift unto itself. I learned to define myself, not let society define me

I didn’t really get teased too much when I was younger but I was VERY insecure, especially about our poverty. WE WERE BROKE and that kinda made me shy. It wasn’t until I was in the 7th grade that I realized what name brand clothes were, or the fact that I didn’t have any. But now, I’m still the same way because I don’t believe I have to spend $200 on jeans to be fly.

My insecurities extended beyond my income level as well. I don’t know why but I always I was ugly, maybe because I saw alot of dudes who in my opinion were busted but were still pulling chicks that I wanted. Nevermind the fact that it wasn’t until I was in the military when I first asked a chick out and yet somehow still had a few girls kinda sweating me.

I love seeing and talking with people from high school because my confidence is so much better than it was back then (I think most people’s are, unless you were a shitty person back in the day). I have a great career (notice I didn’t say job), I’m personable, I’ve kept my light complexion (we lightskin homies, we are BACK!) and people like to be around me, yet I remain humble. I’ve always thought that teasing has the ability to build character in a person. It’s an unfortunate, and often times painful, lesson in life but hey, we overcome things that don’t kill us right?

No Matter Where You Go, There You Are…

@ Shey…
wow this post brings memories. I too was teased for having LARGE eyes….can you see us? I bet you can see to the moon…why are your eyes so big? & so on & so on! kids could be so cruel! I would avoid eye contact with folks just to avoid the attention being drawn to my eyes!

Now I appreciate my eyes. Not to be conceited but, I learned how to apply make up and make my eyes my assets & I do get compliments. It’s one of the 1st things a guy notices! I make eye contact all the time and learned some smart ass comments for those haters who just gotta make stupid remarks bout my EYES! lol

I was teased in Jr High school cuz most of the girls in my 6th -8th Grade class had developed.. They used to call me the Great Wall of the Dominican Republic. Hell, most of the guys wanted to holla at my mom!!! Then I “grew” up..late bloomer actually at around 15.. then BOOM..a full C.. Now a full D.. and I only dated one guy my age..the rest 5yrs older.. but I remember going back to NY a few yrs ago and I saw my Jr High Crush and He did a double take and I just tried to walk away fast- because life was not to gentle on him! LOL! But You live and learn I guess!!

Long time reader first time commenter…i guess this really hit home…I have big lips…heard that BSL comment in high school too…made me hate my lips…i would always suck on my bottom lip to try to hide it….i still to this day am a little shy…I have become alot more comfortable though….and i actually kinda like them…i always said I’d be a complete dime if i had smaller lips…lol…either way…my guy now loves them…and his love for them makes me love them…I tell you hate breeds hate…self hate and other…its unfortunate…

i meant DSL*

I remember getting teased about my boobs when I was about ten. They were a little big for a little girl, and I always thought that they were going to get humongous.

And I would try to hide them……

The rest of me caught up thank goodness.

Hi i dont usually talk bout personal experiences but i felt that this was too important an issue for me not to share. Im of Indian origin [asian indian] and ive always been a girl with curves in all areas, from my lips to my hips! However, its only wen i hit my 20s i accepted who i am outside and on the inside. You see, if ur an indian girl with full lips, breasts and hips u face alot of criticism as a child and then even more as a teen and it basically dsnt stop untill u stop going to family do’s and wat not to get away from it all. Needless to say wen i was young i had a lot of insecurities [imagine ur mama tellin she hates how big ur lips or ur hips are!] then theres school which is a whole lot worse! i think by the time i reached my 20s and got involved in the civil rights movement is when i learnt to say fuck all y’all, this is me and i love everything bout me inside and out. As a result, today i hold my head up high and walk dwn the st wit pride of the woman i have become today. Peace

Were you ever teased in school? If so for what and how did you deal with it? Do you agree that the things you usually get teased for as a kid wind up being what people like about you as an adult? Have you ever bumped into an old bully and they were shocked at how good you looked or how successful you were? Did you ever teas someone as a kid? Do you regret it? Did you realize how much your teasing could affect someone? Why’d you do it in the first place? Was it to shield your own insecurities? If you could go back to high school now with what you know now how would you do things differently?
_______________________

Yes, in junior high school. It was HORRIBLE.

- acne
- no-name clothes
- reject sneakers
- hair
- being the only Black one in honors classes
- the way I talked
- the way I walked
- EVERYTHING

And probably more that I can’t remember.

How did I deal with it? I grinned and bore it most of the time just to hang around the “cool” kids who were constantly teasing/bullying me. But when I got home, and even during the teasing/bullying, forget it. I felt like absolute and utter shit, considered myself sub-human. It affected me for years, and from time to time I’ll remember and just wince. Kids can be cruel.

High school was a little different. I didn’t get teased much although I dressed like a tomboy. Boys liked me a LOT for some reason, so I never lacked male attention during high school.

Most of those people now (from junior high) would probably be surprised now if they saw me.

Unfortunately, I admit to teasing one girl in particular during junior high. EVERYONE teased her. I don’t know how she got through it. She was very tall, white, red hair, freckles, huge red glasses, bad clothes (worse than mine), ears filled with wax, VERY unattractive (sorry to say). But after a while, I began defending her. As an adult, I can look back and say that I began defending her probably because I knew how horrible it felt to feel like a sub-human. I wish I could see her now just to tell her that we were cut from the same cloth.

Hahahaha…

All I have to say is “I HATE KIDS!” They are cruel.

When I was younger, I was always the tallest girl in the class, so I was teased. I was called the “Jolly Black Giant.” AND I have tight eyes, so I was called “Black Jap.”

I used to pray every night for God to make me lighter because of all the teasing. All the boys liked the girls that were mixed and/or light skinned. So, I felt left out.

Now that I am older, I still have image issues. I’m taller than most guys and that makes me feel akward and even though I have grown to love my mocha chocolate’, I still want to slap light chicks who think they are the ish just because they are light.

Yep, my nose lol But I definitely grew into it. The thing is I have my father’s nose and I also happen to be African, so it’s like come on people what do you expect lol. But nah I was never really teased about it, I think because I had a really close knit group of friends and we were the “cool clique” but I did hear comments a few times. Like alot of the people above, I LOVE my nose now and my cheeks compliment it, so I’m always getting complimented on my smile now. If someone would’ve told me, I would’ve gotten this much attention once I filled out and up, I wouldn’t have believed them, but I always look at it like this. If your parents are good looking people, you, more than likely, will be too. So, while I had my awkward stages when I was younger, I always looked at my mother, who I thought was absolutely beautiful and still is, and I would think I have to get at least some of her genes lol and low and behold I definitely got the best of both worlds. Now I try to just reinforce the different standards of beauty in the little ones around me, because some people with insecurity issues grow up and try to compensate for what they lacked growing up and they ended up looking and being phony, I’ve known of few of them. Not a good look, but I’ll end on a positive note. Black people are beautiful…big lips, nose, eyes and all. We are unique and its that uniqueness that makes so envied (collagen injections, tanning beds…but you get the point)

i, too, had full lips. i absolutely hated them. i got teased a lot in school. one day in middle school, i had a substitute teacher by the name of mr. shivers. he was soooo fiiine. anyway, some guys were saying things about my lips and he told them, ‘go ahead and pick on her now. but when you grow up, you are gonna love her lips’. that made me smile all day. even though now that i think of it, it sounds kinda pedophilish (i know, it isn’t a word). i also got teased cause i had big boobs (although they are average now 38DD). last, i develop real early. i had hips, booty, breast and thighs so guys thought i was doing the nasty. little did they know, i didn’t lose my virginity until the 12th grade.

i look at my daughter now and i see the beauty in them. the harsh comments didn’t come from not only my classmates but some of my family members as well. therefore, my main goal is to teach my daughter how to love herself ’cause i don’t want her to go looking for love in the streets. i did and it’s not any fun.

I was teased for my ass when I was young, starting at 10 years old. Guys (and girls) would always comment about my ass, whether it was positive or negative, it always made me so uncomfortable, especially i wasn’t sexually active.
Growing up, basically until I was about 20, I had a problem with my ass, I was always trying to cover it up wearing long T-shirts and sweaters, feeling uncomfortable because it was always noticeable until…I slowly understood that’s what guys actually liked about me. And that’s when it turned into a weapon (of mass destruction). After all, it wasn’t a surprise, I did get it from my Momma…thick thighs, big hips and small waist.

this is why I hate kids lol. so cruel

@Clove

This is clearly a case were parent should build there children self-esteem so lil kids cant tear it down. Most of those kids tease because of they’re on insecurity. If parents are teaching there kids better it will reflect in how they behave but mostly how they take critism. Kids are kids and people will probably always make fun of others both clowning somebody shouldnt leave them with mental scars and issues.

When you have enough confidence you laugh it off and move on. Did you put that confidence in your child today?

wowwwww
how do i attack this one?

well big lips are one of my features, i refer to them as ”full lips” … we, as AMERICANS, are sooo sensitive to adjectives. Soo, one has to becareful of what you say, how you say it, and of course… who you say it too!

however, i loveeeee me some ”full” lips on a guy. its better to kiss you with my dear. thin lips, which i tease my brother about all the time, just don’t do it for me. as i mentioned above, i have a full lips, i simply overtake the ”kiss” per say should my guy have small lips.

ohhhh this is a topic for ya nswo, *wink

when i first meet a guy, i check out (in this exact order too) … SHOES, ATTIRE, TEETH, LIPS, and thennn HIS EYES, AND GROOMING HABITS. This is by appearance alone. Nothing else makes a better impression. Past that, it is what comes out of that mouth of his on whether or not he will pass go, collect 200$ or straight to jail!

@ nswo
I’m laughing at the fact u used DSL… my girls and i use that term to insure that our lip stick/gloss -game is proper. Hence, “DSL Check?” Reply “You good.” lol

~peace n salutations ~

From the day I was born my godmother said I looked like a three month-old instead of a newborn. My teasing was done mainly in elementary school cause all the other black girls had perms, i was the only child that had a Caribbean accent, i was kinda heavy then and to top it off i was taller then everyone else, you could not have put a bigger target on me! Needless to say got plenty encouragement from my older sister and now at 19 I stand 6ft 1.5 inches tall with locks. Walking down the street left, right and center men are staring at me cause of these same long legs and kinky hair i was teased about when i was younger.

i live in georgia, an the women you refer to are the norm around here. it’s nice to see healthy bodies with natural features.. plastic lips look like dookie.. plastic boob women look like porn stars. women should just chill with the inhancments. there is a man out there who will like you for you.

@Lolita and Mimi,

I got both. Tits and Ass. From 10 years old. Straight Coke bottle. By the time I was 12, grown men were offering money to “get in the car”. I come from a financially stable, conservative and religious family so there was no temptation to move into sexual situations until I was grown but I shudder to think what could have happened had I not been raised with such a firm foundation.

I got teased horribly – Bertha Butt, Cush Cush (with the squeezing hand gestures), Please don’t touch the Charmine…. just crazy.

It did give me a slight complex….I thought I was fat until well into college (not anymore) and I worried about my safety because some men can be very aggressive.

As an adult now I appreciate the teasing because it forced me to develop a sense of humor, my personality and a killer work ethic. I appreciate my body. I’m just very careful about the situations I put myself in.

when i was growing up i got teased a lot about my lips it good to know that i was’nt the only one
i got teased with ths dsl to i got asked about kisses a lot i did kiss a lot i learned how to be a good kisser now that im older but now my lips fit my body and i dont get teased anymore

Oh yes, boy was i teased bout my breasts! Lol
Just cuz i had some, n @that time no other girl did, lil boys found it weird and amusing 2comment on them ALL the time.
But i wasnt the type of girl 2take the negative comments, even tho u cant really stop it the whole time.
At times, when i was gettin fed up, i just managed 2always make them leave me alone
But yes, i agree wit the statement that “the things you usually get teased for as a kid wind up being what people like about you as an adult”.
My girls are one of my fav characteristics, and i wouldnt change them 4the world

OMG – I cannot tell you how happy I am to see this blog!!!

I know the normal discussion amongst black people is hair and skin colour…but facial features seems like the last taboo and nobody ever wants to tackle it!! Facial features are ‘cultural signifiers’ too so I don’t know why we never discuss it!!

So yeah, skin colour and hair were never my issue. No I’m not light skinned nor do I have curly hair. I’m nappy!! My issue was my facial features…big nose and big lips!!

I got teased about my lips all the time…I was so self conscious…what made it worse was that my asshole of a father offered to pay to get them reduced. Can you imagine how that made me feel? forget having a face that only your parents could love.

As I got older I tried to accept my looks, but still have moments when i wish I took my father up on the offer…:o(

The thing is beautiful women, even black ones don’t look like me. Aside from the actresses you mentioned, there are not many women who have wider noses and thick lips…and if they do its one or the other not both. Add some natural hair into the mix and you might as well be dead!!!

So my self esteem, confidence has gone up and down over the years…and sometimes I think I’ll never get over being teased…I still feel like an outcast sometimes….self acceptance is just as hard now as its ever been….

The same thing happened to me when i was growing up. Back in the caribbean, i was never teased for my lips until i moved to canada. I heard it all..DSL, Apocalips, dick lips. But then when i got to high school and i was maturing in to my body, one of the main reasons alot of guys liked me was..well, my lips! As a result, i was labelled a ho. I used to try tuck them in or hold them a certain way so they seem smaller. I even considered plastic surgery, somtimes i still do, to get them smaller.

It did however, occured to me that alot of women would love to have lips like mine.

I’m growing into them & i also admire women who have nice thick lips.

Mine are well sexy too! =)

I know I am late in posting, but felt I had to say something. I grew up in a community where looks/features were of high value. A lot of the girls in my neighborhood were light skinned and had what was considered either pretty eyes or good hair. Being someone who did not fit that image I was teased what seemed incessantly. I won’t lie it caused me to develop a complex that in many ways I still carry today. I am very mistrustful, particularly of men. I am trying to do better, but it is hard. Especially in a society that still seems to force these images of beauty down our throats (sadly, even BET,who should know better). I am worried that no matter how much self worth I enstill in my 5 yr old daughter, it may not be enough to counteact the job that society may do on her, since she too does fit the stereotypical image of beauty. If anyone has advice on how to deal with that, I would love to hear it.

@amommyslove

The fact you are trying to instill a sense of self-worth in your child at an early age is great. She needs that positive reinforcement and strength of character, and once that’s instilled it will be a great foundation for a confident adult. She should also know that she can always talk to mommy, maybe even hear mom’s personal struggles and how to overcome so she knows she’s not alone