Evening Epilogue: Day 30 (The Victory Lap) 90/90

Good evening,

Well, I did it. I made it through the 30-day fast and 90 blogs marathon. For those that caught on late or just missed it, I explained what the fast and marathon were all about HERE. Just to summarize the reasoning, though, it was/is a 30-day spiritual journey where I abstained from food and beverage during daylight hours, and gave up liquor, sex and impure thoughts. To top it all off, I decided to document the experience here on NakedWithSocksOn with three blogs a day. That wasn’t the original plan, but I’ll get to that a little later…

Being here in this moment, I’m not sure how I feel. Part of me is ecstatic that it’s finally complete and I can go back to some form of normalcy, while the other half isn’t as eager to let it all go. In fact, I won’t. I’m going to try my best to maintain some of the positive habits I picked up along this 30-day ride, like working out more regularly, eating healthier, writing with more purpose and just trying to be a better human being. I doubt that I’ll be waking up at 5:30 in the morning anymore, but who knows…

I want to thank each and every person that checked in on me and offered support during the fast and marathon. Especially those that spread word of my blog and marathon to their friends and colleagues. I truly appreciate it, just as I appreciate the regular commenters. Although I don’t know who most of y’all are, you’ve become part of my online family and I look forward to hearing feedback from the usual suspects just as much as the new and anonymous ones too.

Now, like I said earlier, the initial plan wasn’t to do 90 blogs in 30 days, but somehow this thing took on a life of it’s own and went from 30 blogs, with a slight possibility of there being 60, into this 90-piece diary. The funny thing is, when I started this blog I never wanted it to be a diary. I always thought the day in the life themed blogs were a bit vain. Sure, I write about myself and what I’m going through, but I try to do that with a lesson in mind or just a way to provide someone with a daily laugh. But going into the fast and marathon I wanted to record my experience and that’s what the Morning Monologues and Evening Epilogues were about. I wrote those each morning and night right then and there in the moment, I had no idea if they would be good or bad and didn’t really expect people to care about those as much. Yes, some of the Monologues and Epilogues were bad and others were damn good, but those were written for me and I appreciate those that bared with me and my randomness over the past month.

The whole point of the fast was to get some sort of clarity and achieve some goals. With that in mind I just went back and reread the Marathon Introduction to see how much my thought process had changed over the past 30 days. Truthfully, I think I did pretty darn good, but at the same time I see there are a few things that I didn’t fully accomplish. I am only human and this was my first time tackling such a daunting task, so of course some slip-ups were to be expected. If you guys have learned anything about me over the past few months it’s that I’m pretty honest, so here’s my personal assessment of how I did.

FAILURES
1) IMPURE THOUGHTS
The hardest part of the fast wasn’t the physical aspects, but the mental. In addition to purifying your body, I was supposed to cleans my mind as well. That started off on a good foot, but as time went on I found that more difficult. Although I tried to curb my language, a few curse words and perverted jokes came out during conversations. I also occasionally caught myself looking at women and having sexual thoughts and would have to clear my mind whenever I caught myself. Physical attraction and admiration are completely natural and I doubt that should be held against me, but keeping my mind 100% clean was a definite hit or miss affair.
LESSON LEARNED: Impurities will always seep into the mind, it’s just a matter of whether or not you control them or allow them to overpower you.

2) WORKING OUT
Okay, I was supposed to work out every single day of the fast, but what had happened was… I didn’t. I started off pretty steadily, but as the days went on and I went to bed later and later, I opted for a few extra winks before getting up to eat just before the sun rose instead of sets of crunches. Still, I did up my overall workout regiment and some folks have said I’ve noticeable slim down and got a little more defined. Still not where I want to be nor did I maintain my proposed plan, but it’s a good start.
LESSON LEARNED: You can always squeeze out one more rep—it’s mind over matter.

3) CHURCH
I had also planned on attending church every Sunday of the course of the last 30 days. Sadly, I only made one successful journey to church. I can easily make the excuse that my friend whose church I was going to didn’t attend one weekend so I didn’t have a ride, or that I had work to do the other two weekends, but they would be just that—excuses. The one time I did go was an interesting experience that I documented HERE, and even though I didn’t attend as regularly as I intended, I still prayed more regularly and gave thanks for the things God had afforded me.
LESSON LEARNED: God exists in our hearts not a man-made building.

SUCCESSES
1) COMPLETION
I did it. I made it to this point. I went 30 days straight without eating during sunlight hours, not consuming alcohol, not engaging in physical pleasure. Sure I may have had swallowed my last bit of breakfast a minute after sunrise, and I may have had an Al Bundy moment of comfort, but aside from that I held my ground despite temptations and sleepiness.
LESSON LEARNED: I can do whatever it is I set my mind to.

2) POSITIVITY
Throughout much of this experience I managed to hold on to a pretty positive outlook on life. Prior to this I had a few days where I wasn’t happy. I’d wake up in a bad mood and just wasn’t in a good frame of mind. Stress was getting the best of me. But now I smile more. I’m still a realist, but I try not to always focus on the negative as much anymore. That goes for my overall outlook and use of negative language as well.
LESSON LEARNED: Negative energy only breeds more negativity.

3) WROTE WITH PURPOSE
Going into this I theorized that this fast and marathon would produce some of my best writing. Some folks had labeled my blog overtly sexual and sometimes offensive. Well, in my quest to avoid impure thoughts I avoided writing anything sexualized or “dirty,” I wrote to clear my head, convey a message, share hilarious moments and to inspire through my written word. Not for nothing, I think I really did clean out my closet and created some pieces that at times surprised me. I say none of that with conceit, but it’s amazing how the mind works and how powerful the written word can be. I feel that I touched so many people over vast distances over the past 30 days and I hope that I can continue to do that in the near and distant future.
LESSON LEARNED: It’s when I write for myself that I create some of my best work.

Well, kiddies this is the part where I say good night. I hope that you enjoyed the ride as much as I did, but now it’s time to get back to my normally scheduled program—with some mental growth of course. But stay rest-assured that the blogs will continue each and every day just not three times a day. I’m still amazed that I was able to crank out that many in such a short span of time. But like I said in the beginning, I always accomplish whatever it is I set my mind to do.

Thanx for listening…